Thursday, December 29, 2005

what the tivo is for

I love tivo, tivo tivo tivo
It is perhaps the most important invention in recent history.
We have been liberated from the chains of tv boredom that have enslaved us.

No more bland piece-mealed E eye-candy documentaries featuring commentary by people you've never heard of but who are being treated as celebrities.

No more mindless dwelling on what exactly is being blurred out on the Howard Stern show.

No more Real World/Road Rules Part 17 - Cancun the Final Inferno to Hell.

No, now untethered i can spend my time on what's really important. Tonight it was nearly 90 minutes of uninterrupted commercial freeSouth Park. Oh sweet gluttony.

I'd never seen the episode on Scientology, where Stan is identified as the second coming of L. Ron Hubbard. Too funny and scary, especially when they went over what Scientology is actually about. Yow. Then Tom Cruise, John Travolta and eventually R. Kelly all hid in Stan's closet and refused to come out. You can see where this is going.

While on the subject of Mr. Cruise, Esquire magazine recently published a column which drew into question Mr. Cruise's sexuality as well as the authenticity of his relationship with Katie Holmes. This alone is about as interesting as a pair of dingo's kidneys, who really cares? one way or the other. What is much more intriguing is that in the next issue, Mr. Cruise's lawyer wrote a letter to the Editor pointing out how "false and defamatory" these assertions were and basically demanding a retraction. Highly entertaining, but come on is this guy overcompensating or what?

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